I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
