i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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