I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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