Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize