I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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