They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
