it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
There r osticjed everywhere
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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