i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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