Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
and she was petting her beer can
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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