There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize