I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
