its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize