a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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