It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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