Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
