Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
