But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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