dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Randomize
