At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
