my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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