just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
