She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
her vagine was all disorganized.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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