from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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