oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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