I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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