Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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