Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
