i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Randomize
