Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
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