She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Randomize
