This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Randomize
