Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
