i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
