Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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