i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
