I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
