...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
