help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
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Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
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What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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