Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
