do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Randomize
