Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
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Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
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Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila