At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
OPIZZABONMYDICK
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize