why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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