Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
i drank out of a bidet.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
