next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Randomize
