How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Randomize
