she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize