please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize