Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
