I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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