How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
hell yes lets make some ravioli
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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